Last Wednesday I received a call that my 92-year-old Grandma (picture at left taken in July 09; second picture is with Evan at Erica and Kendall’s wedding) was not doing well. Thursday she seemed to be a little better, but by Friday they determined to bring in Hospice. Hospice felt that she probably had about 3 or 4 days left. Friday evening I received a call from my sister just as Austin’s basketball game was finishing up (they won….finally!). She said they felt it was now hours instead of days. We drove home from the ball game, I threw some clothes in a bag, and headed alone to Indianapolis. By 11pm Grandma’s two daughters and three of her four grandchildren were at her bedside. By 1am, most everyone was so tired so they headed home to sleep and my sister Juli and I took the night shift. Around 3am Grandma’s breathing changed and within minutes she took her last breath with Juli and I by her side.
There’s something very holy about being with someone when they move from earth to eternity in heaven. I’ve had that opportunity on three occasions in my life—when some friends of ours lost their 2-year-old to a brain tumor, when Mark’s grandma was taken off life support, and Friday night when my sweet Grandma went from our arms to Jesus’ arms. Those memories have made a permanent impression on my heart and mind. I have no regrets with Grandma’s death. She often visited our family and our children knew her well. We’ve made many trips to Indy to spend time with her. In fact, we saw her on January 6 and I said to my kids, “this may be the last time you see Grandma…let’s make it special.” They responded with, “Mom, you’ve said that every time we’ve seen her since summer.” I told them that they may be weary of me saying it, but one of these days they’ll see the truth of it. Indeed January 6 was that last time they would spend time with Grandma.
Do you have an elderly parent, aunt, uncle, or grandparent that you need to sit down and write to or make a phone call to? Someone that you need to just make the trip and visit? Don’t wait any longer. We are certainly not promised tomorrow.
We’ll be in Indianapolis Monday and Tuesday of this week for the calling and the funeral. My family is doing well with this…they know Grandma lived a full and beautiful life.
I'm sorry for your loss but knowing that you'll see her again in Heaven is always a comfort.
Several years ago we made a trip to Texas with our (then) 2 boys. We drove an extra 3 hours (each way) to visit my husband's grandmother. About 6 months later she went to Heaven. We never regretted taking the time to go see her!
Stephanie,
I'm so glad you made that trip! You're right…the extra effort is worth it.
It must be such a comfort to know she is waiting for you in Heaven.
Praying that the kids also get through this well.
Blessings
Dirkie
Jill,
Please accept my sympathies. I've prayed for your family. I am so glad for you that you were able to make the trip. I was there when my father passed away 4 years ago. When my grandmother passed away a smile stayed on her face. It was beautiful.
Kim Ostrum- Rosemount, MN
Dear Jill, I send my love and prayers to you today. What a home-comming your Grandmother must have had when she met the Her Savior and Lord! My Grandmother is 90 and her and I have been so very close. I am going to go call her right now!!
Blessings to you and your family!
Sue Heimer
I am so sorry for the loss of your grandma, there are no words. I know the feeling of being with someone when they take their last breathe and how comforting that can be as you move forward, knowing you were there right beside them in that moment. I was there with my mom who finally lost her 20 yr battle with MS nearly 4 years ago and I will NEVER regret that I was there by her side, whispering sweet words into her ear as she let go. Thank you for sharing your experience, may it help others in their time of sadness too. God Bless you and your family.
Jill, I lost my Grandma (my kids call her GG) on January 10th. I got to see her the day before she passed. She hadn't been well but we weren't expecting it to be so final. The doctors told us that they think she just went to sleep. I am SO glad that my Mom called me and asked me to come and help her. Sometimes when I least expect it, I feel the whole in my heart. I can't wait to see her again in Heaven!
Thank you all for your sweet words and your prayers.
Michelle, I'm so sorry for your loss, too. I'm so glad you, too, were able to see your Grandma before she made her trip to heaven.
I have traveled fairly well across the globe in my job for 13 years and I feel embarrassed to say that I had quite a contorted view of the world especially the western world. I was of the opinion that only Asians have strong binding family values as most of us live in joint families.
Reading your poignant post, I realize it's not geographical distance that matters, but the distance from each others heart.
I too lost my mother on 10th January 2010 at age 76. Our children have beautiful memories of their togetherness with their grandmother. She lived with my brother, his wife and two boys which is the norm in India. Me and my sister live in the same city, so we were fortunate to have her around us very often.
Educating us was her biggest investment and hence did not have a bank account. Yet, days before she passed away she wanted the little change she had in her wallet to be divided among her grandchildren, which may at the most be enough to buy a tub of ice cream.
My daughter misses her grandmother when she has to do her chores and even when she has to finish all the vegetables served to her. My mum often visited us just to apply a balm on the kid's foreheads much after their headaches was gone.
She passed away in the presence of her loved ones and for that we are greatly indebted to our heavenly father.