Too often in marriage communication—and particularly in conflict—we make a big deal out of things that shouldn’t really matter.  Today’s Marriage Monday is a reminder for us to not take the bait!

Mark says…
It’s easy for us to miss out on what our spouse is communicating when we get hung up on how they said something to us or a word they used or didn’t use when they spoke to us.

Jill says…
Sometimes we do that to skirt the subject and not deal with the issue on the table.  And sometimes we do that simply because accuracy is important to us, or we take the tone of voice personally. 

Mark says…
When this happens it’s important for us to learn to overlook the faults of our spouse and instead commit to hearing what they are saying and resolving whatever issue is on the table.  Instead of getting snagged by HOW your spouse is saying something, focus on WHAT they are saying.  Instead of getting caught up in “little accuracy discrepancies”, listen to the heart of what your spouse is saying.

Jill says…
Too many of us are out to “win” over our spouse than truly listen to one another, meet in the middle somewhere, and move forward together. 

Mark says…
The next time you’re in a “discussion” with your spouse, be careful to stay focused on the issue at hand.  If he/she says something that you want to correct in some way…don’t take the bait!

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