It’s Tuesday again and time for our Chapter 4 discussion! Reading this chapter was such a good reminder for me.
The Perspective is titled “I’m in high demand.” It looks at how many times we hear, “Mommy…” or “Mooooooom” or “Mom…” and feel like there’s not enough of us to go around. But when you look at Jesus’ experience he was in high demand, too. Everyone wanted something from him: a miracle, a healing, an answer to a question.
But Jesus didn’t meet ALL the needs around him and we don’t have to either. Have you ever really considered that? How are you doing with cutting yourself some slack?
On to Chapter 4: Jesus was angry: the truth about boundaries.
Was this chapter a surprise? Do you think about Jesus being angry very often? I know I don’t! But his anger was a righteous anger that drew important boundaries. He knew when to say “yes” and when to say “no.”
Of the 12 suggestions on how to say “no” on pages 67-70, which one do you struggle with the most? Which was most helpful?
What is one takeaway from this chapter that you want to move from your head to your heart?
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Don’t have lots of time to comment today, fussy baby…but wanted to jump on and let you know that I so enjoyed this chapter. I keep saying that, but it is like every page God is telling me something! I struggle with saying no in lots of ways. There is so much I am taking from this chapter, I couldn’t possibly list it all! The biggest was having someone hold me accountable. This is really hard for me to do. Thanks again for such a great book! It is truly life changing!
The two that hit me the hardest from the 12 suggestions were:
#2: Never say yes on the spot. Like many moms I am sure, I try to be a people pleaser–and it gets me into trouble, because while I am trying to please ‘anyone and everyone else’, my family ends up suffering!
#6: Not every hour of the day needs to be scheduled or filled with activity. I tend to write myself out lists each day: do this, do that, go here, etc. One thing that changed my thinking on this is: instead of writing out a list, write out more of a schedule. Try to estimate how much time it will take to do each ‘thing that you need to do’, and then write that down.
It has kept a person like me from listing the 92 things I need to do that day, and getting to the end of the day and feeling like a failure because there are 60 things still left undone. When I view each activity/errand/function that I feel I should accomplish each day with a time constraint, it helps me evaluate exactly how many things I can fit into my day–and which things I can NOT.
Also, going along with that (and our discussion on retreating into the Father’s arms for quiet time) I have learned that I can’t try to ‘fit in’ my quiet time with God–that also has to be written down, into my daily schedule–so that I can make sure to allow time for it to get done each day.
Another wonderful chapter Jill! I can’t say enough about how I love this book.
Another great chapter!
Devin, I like your idea of making a schedule with time alotments for each thing. I make lists too. Great idea!
From the list, I struggle with…
#9 When you do say no, don’t feel that you need to give a long list of excuses… I feel bad to say no and feel like I have to tell the person why I’m saying no.
I really liked #12. Remember that saying no allows others the opportunity to say yes. As mentioned in #10, I don’t have to say yes just because I could do something/have the abilities to do it. Saying no allows someone else the opportunity to serve and I like thinking of my “no” in this way.
In the perspective, it was a real eye opener to realize that Jesus didn’t meet everyone’s need–He did all that He intended to, and all that God had planned and that was enough. How freeing! We have a high calling, but it is good to keep it in perspective.
From the list, one that resonated with me is #7–set a limit to the number of long term committments. It is easy for me to say yes, so this is good advice to keep in mind.
Thanks, Jill! Glad you had a good trip!
I love this list. I struggle with many of these things form time to time. I have established what I call my “three day waiting period” before I commit to things. It has really helped me to not be impulsive.
I think I need to post these all around my house so I remember them!
2 days behind this time, but sticking with it, despite an EXTREMELY overwhelming season in my life. I just quickly wanted to share something that came to mind while reading this chapter – it’s a quote that has helped me tremendously: “Whenever I say YES to something, I’m also saying NO to something else.” I read that in one of the Hearts at Home Magazines several years ago, and it has really stuck with me. It is so true!!! It has helped me say no more often, b/c I do want to be able to say ‘YES’ to keeping my priorities in line with God. I’ve even said “No” to Bible studies, in order for me to make room to have one-on-one time with the Lord at home. I look forward to the next chapter.
Thank you for this great quote! It’s so important to remember!