If you have been following us for any length of time, then you know Mark and I are passionate about marriage. Our own marriage went through a dark crisis about 10 years ago, which is an experience we are really open about. However, it is often hard to find other couples who are open about their own story and struggles. That’s why I’m honored to share today’s episode.
This is a conversation that Mark and I had with Ryan and Kristin Eller. They aren’t speakers or authors; they are everyday folks that have been through something hard and came out the other side of it together. Whether or not your own marriage has been affected by infidelity, I know everyone can benefit from the wisdom Ryan and Kristin have learned through their journey.
In this episode, you’ll hear:
- The importance of building intimacy in marriage
- How your community has a vital role in supporting your marriage
- Why you should care about sports teams, office drama, and hobbies
- Why there is still hope in your situation
I am so grateful for Ryan and Kristin’s openness in this episode. Take some time to listen in!
Resources mentioned in this episode:
- Not “Just Friends”: Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity After Infidelity by Shirley P. Glass
- Marriage 2.0 Intensive
- Rebuilding Trust Course
- FREE Rebuilding Trust Guide
- As a thank you for listening, get your 3 free eBooks.
My Key Takeaways:
1) There is hope and help. If your marriage is going through something hard, reach out to the community around you: your friends, family, and church. There are people who care about you and want to be there to comfort and encourage you. Find those people that love you enough to be honest with you. You don’t have to go through hard circumstances alone.
2) Find a counselor. This is so important, and I appreciate Kristin sharing how finding a counselor helped her in processing everything that was taking place in their marriage.
3) Difficulties force you to take down your walls and be transparent. When you encounter difficulties or infidelity in your marriage, you have a choice. You can stay behind the walls that separate you from your spouse or you can take them down. When you open up all areas of your life to your spouse, you can experience a deeper intimacy than you ever knew.
4) Share the small stuff. Getting to a place of deeper intimacy doesn’t just happen in the bedroom. Intimacy occurs in everyday relationship, recreation, conversation, and so much more! That means learning to care about what is important to your spouse. If she cares about pottery, learn to engage in that with her. If he cares about a sports team, learn to ask questions about how they are doing or go to a game together! It’s through these little things that intimacy can grow to a deeper level.
About Ryan & Kristin:
Ryan & Kristin Eller are “normal” people with a powerful story of redemption. They have two kids and own a few rental properties as well as manage rental properties. Kristin is an accountant. Everything changed the day Ryan’s infidelity came to light. Ryan & Kristin went from being on the verge of divorce to a restored and more intimate marriage than they had ever had before. Their hope is that their story would encourage and help you do the same.
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