Have you ever noticed a tendency in yourself to put your own wants before the needs of others?
If we’re honest, that’s not an easy thing to admit. Most people don’t naturally think of themselves as selfish. And yet, when we slow down and truly examine our hearts, selfishness is something we all wrestle with at times.
Recently, Mark has felt God directing his attention to this area in his own life. What we’ve discovered is that selfishness can be sneaky—which makes it difficult to identify. It can show up as that desire to stay on the couch rather than fold the load of laundry sitting in the dryer. It could look like neglecting to show up at a friend’s party because you didn’t feel like going, even though you know it would mean a lot to them.
Selfishness takes many forms, but no matter how it shows up, it affects the state of our hearts in a very real way. That’s why we wanted to take some time to talk about how addressing selfishness is having an impact in our life, as well as offer some tips that everyone can use to tackle selfishness.
In this episode, you’ll hear:
- How avoiding sacrifice can cause us to miss blessings
- Four steps to address selfishness
- How self-care is different from selfishness
- And more!
Resources mentioned in this episode:
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- Marriage Through the Ups and Downs of Life with Mary Beth and Steven Curtis Chapman | Episode 295
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Our Key Takeaways:
1) Deep down, we know when we are being selfish. Selfishness and self-care can tend to look similar from the outside. However, where selfishness says, “I don’t want to,” self-care says, “I can’t keep pouring out from an empty tank.” The difference is our heart’s attitude behind our response. So while others may not be able to tell if our response is coming from a place of self-care or selfishness, we know the root of our actions.
2) Selfishness can prevent us from accessing unknown blessings. Selfishness only sees how something benefits us on the surface. If we allow our selfishness to rule over every decision, then we will miss out on the not-so-obvious benefits of selfless action! In this conversation, Mark shared how his selfishness made him want to avoid babysitting our grandchildren. But because he sacrificed his time and energy to do so, he now has a bond with our grandson that he wouldn’t have had otherwise. Consider what blessings your own selfishness may be causing you to miss out on.
3) Overcoming selfishness starts with awareness and ends with action. It can be hard to recognize our patterns of selfishness. However, when we examine our lives, decisions, and attitudes, it should become clear where we tend to struggle with selfishness. Once we have done that, our response should end by taking action in the opposite direction from selfishness. Where we would have previously said no to anything that inconvenienced us, we should start saying yes and acting from a place of sacrificial love.
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