Did you know that there are more ways to break trust in a marriage than infidelity? Today, I have my hubby, Mark, joining me on the show, and we are going to be launching into a topic that we often explore in our marriage coaching: broken trust.
While infidelity certainly is something that will significantly break trust, it’s important that we understand the other ways trust can be broken in a marriage. It’s not uncommon in our marriage intensives to help a couple understand that they’re dealing with an issue of broken trust, and placing the correct label on what’s causing disconnection is such an eye-opener that helps them move closer towards healing.
In today’s episode, you’ll hear:
- 12 ways trust can be broken in a marriage (outside of infidelity).
- The impact a loss of trust has on a relationship.
- Practical examples of what this might look like in your marriage.
- And why there is always hope!
We hope this episode helps you identify areas in your own relationship where trust needs to be restored!
Want to join us for our free webinar about rebuilding trust on May 2 or May 3? Register for free here!
Resources mentioned in this episode:
- Free Webinar: How We Rebuilt Our Marriage After Broken Trust
- Trust Buckets: How Rebuilding Trust in a Marriage Works | #MarriageMonday
- As a thank you for listening, get your 3 free eBooks!
My Key Takeaways:
1) Are you consistently present emotionally? When we are (consistently) not emotionally present, we break trust in our relationship. Being emotionally present means that we take note of the things that our spouse cares about, we avoid being so distracted that we “check out,” and we engage with those we love in meaningful ways. When we are emotionally present, we signal to our spouse that we care about them enough to notice their feelings and express our own. As we mentioned in today’s episode, a spouse’s awareness to bids for attention from their spouse has been found to be a key indicator of where a relationship will go the distance.
2) “Control limits our spouse from being who they are or from having their own perspectives, thoughts, or ideas.” Control can be a big trust-breaker in many marriages. Often, this can come out in belittling our spouse, negating their thoughts and opinions, or parenting our spouse. If this dynamic is perpetuated, it slowly erodes the foundation of trust a healthy relationship needs to be built on.
3) Trust is rebuilt through consistent changed behavior over time. Just because trust has been broken doesn’t mean your relationship has no hope or is doomed to end! After you understand the ways trust can be broken, it’s time to start rebuilding, which only happens through consistent changed behavior over time. If you broke trust by not doing what you said you would do, you need to start doing what you say you will. If you have broken trust by being controlling, you need to start giving up control and trusting your spouse’s decisions and thoughts. Both Mark and I have been in a place of broken trust. We want you to know that, though the process takes time, it is possible to restore trust and connection.
Would you like to be notified by email when a new No More Perfect Podcast episode releases? Just fill in your name and email and we’ll make sure you’re in the know!
Where will I find the show notes for this podcast? Thank you.
Hi Kimberly, You posted your comment on the show notes. ????
Is there a book or podcast that you and/or your husband has done that can teach mothers how to pray for their son or daughter that’s having an affair?
Pray that the scales will fall off your son’s eyes, pray that he will want to do only what God wants him to do, pray against walking in the flesh and that he will instead walk in the Spirit, pray that there will be conflict between him and the affair partner.
I would love more info on how to improve emotional aspect and critical spirit. For marriage and grown children
I just listened to your podcast what broken trust looks like outside of infidelity and would like to listen to the recorded resource How we rebuilt our marriage after broken trust. I cannot access through the resources because it was in May.
Can I please get access to it.
I just listened to your What broken truss looks like outside of infidelity. I would like to listen to one of the resources. How we rebuilt our marriage after broken trust. I was unable to access it because it was on in May. Can I please have access to it. Thank you,