Are there some aspects of your relationship where you often feel worked up, angry, or even like things aren’t fair? This is a prime breeding ground for resentment to take root. This could be a result of something your spouse has done or something they aren’t doing that causes resentment to boil up inside of you. However, resentment often grows as a result of an issue in our own hearts.
In this episode, we are exploring how to untangle resentment in your marriage. Joining me is Chelsea Damon, author of I Thought This Would Make Me Happy. Chelsea is an author, blogger, foster and biological mom, and wife to Josh. She is passionate about cultivating a loving family and helping others do the same.
In this episode, you’ll hear:
- What causes resentment to grow in marriage
- Why it is important to examine our hearts regularly
- How to combat resentment with gratitude
- And so much more…
I can’t wait to hear how this conversation has helped you!
(As we start into our fifth year of the podcast, you’ll start hearing a shoutout at the beginning of each episode. This is an opportunity for us to celebrate our listeners, and specifically the transformation and celebrations in your life. Want to reach out to us? You can contact us here on our website or text our new No More Perfect hotline at 309-431-1718.)
Resources mentioned in this episode:
- [BOOK] I Thought This Would Make Me Happy: How to Fight Less, Forgive Faster, and Cultivate Joy in Your Marriage
- Connect with Chelsea on her website, Instagram, or Facebook
- Join me at the Empty Nest Full Life Retreat!
- As a thank you for listening, get your 3 free eBooks.
My Key Takeaways:
1) Resentment grows when we don’t address it. This isn’t something we can ignore or push down and it will go away on its own. Resentment builds and grows and distorts how we interpret our spouse’s actions or inaction. Take the time to address it by going to the Lord in prayer.
2) Start by looking at your own heart. Before we do anything else, we need to examine our own hearts and take our resentment to God. Because resentment is not always based on truth, we have to work on it from the inside out. This doesn’t mean that you won’t have anything to talk about with your spouse, but it’s important to check our expectations and motivations first.
3) Cultivate gratitude. We can combat resentment with gratitude. Resentment says look at all the things I don’t have and what my spouse isn’t doing. Whereas gratefulness says I’m blessed to have all the things I have been blessed with. One of the ways to avoid stirring up resentment is to use requests rather than accusations when speaking to your spouse. This could sound like, “It would mean a lot to me if we could prioritize intentional time together over dinner by putting our phones away.” instead of, “You never pay attention to me!”
About Chelsea:
Chelsea Damon is an author, blogger, foster and biological mom, and wife to Josh. She is passionate about cultivating a loving family and helping others do the same. Chelsea takes her pour-over coffee with a generous amount of half-and-half and enjoys writing, the gym, photography, baking sourdough, gardening, and trying new things. She lives in South Carolina with her husband and three children.
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