When it comes to conflict in relationships, things can get messy. It doesn’t matter if it’s a marriage relationship, a parent-child relationship, or even a friendship. Conflict has a way of dividing and destroying if we don’t have the necessary skills to repair it.

This week we met with a couple that is working through conflict with their adult daughter. As we were discussing the importance of listening skills and how to clean up conflict in a relationship, we realized just how important the information was and decided to share it with you here on the podcast.

Regardless of the conflict or who it is with, we all need to learn both how to handle other people’s hurt and how to respond in a loving way that can help heal it.

Join Mark and I as we share:

• Why we need to focus on impact over intent
• Important principles for handling conflict
• What we can say to communicate empathy and validation
• And more!

We pray this episode is helpful to you today!

Resources mentioned in this episode:

• As a thank you for listening, get your 3 free eBooks.
• No More Perfect Marriages by Mark & Jill Savage
• Rebuilding Trust Course
• On-Demand Seminar: No More Perfect Marriages Home Edition

My Key Takeaways:

1) You will hurt other people. It is impossible to avoid hurting other people entirely. We encounter unintentional hurt all the time in our coaching, and we see it over and over in all kinds of relationships. While we can’t avoid unintentionally hurting others, what we can do is learn how to respond well when it happens.

2) Start by listening to understand. When we encounter conflict, it is important to approach it with a desire to listen in order to understand. This can help the hurt person know they were accurately heard and it helps you confirm that you understood them correctly. While it can be scary to get to the heart of how we hurt another person, we need to understand the whole picture of how we hurt them. We won’t do this perfectly at first, but you’ll get better and better with consistency!

3) Practice giving a full apology. A full apology says, “I know I hurt you in this way. Will you forgive me?” It communicates the hurt you caused, acknowledges how the person feels, and asks for forgiveness. At the end of your full apology, it’s important to wait for the response. If they cannot offer forgiveness now, your response could be something like: “I understand. When you feel you are able to, would you let me know?”

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