The Gift of Selflessness in MarriageMark: Saturday night Jill and I watched the movie Call of the Wild with Harrison Ford.  We were both surprised that the animals in the movie weren’t real but rather CGI (Computer Generated Imagery). Jill asked me about ten minutes in if I was enjoying it. I said, “It’s a little odd, but let’s watch a little more of it.”

Jill: I’m drawn to reality, not fake, so I wasn’t enjoying the movie at all. However, it was obvious Mark was enjoying it. So I just stepped into his world and watched it with him. I decided to accept a different kind of call–the call to selflessness.

When it was over, Mark said, “That was moving,” and I said, “That was painful.” We both laughed!

Mark: We are so different!

Jill: After we laughed, Mark said to me, “Thank you for not ruining it for me.”

Mark: I was so grateful that Jill didn’t share her opinion or force her preferences on me. She was selfless with the movie and it blessed me. Selflessness is a decision to deny what you want in order to help someone else get what they want. She did that. She denied what she wanted (to not watch the movie) in order to allow me to enjoy it.

Jill: Over time both Jill and I have learned the importance of selflessness in marriage. When we have different preferences, we have a natural tendency to want what we want. When we deny ourselves, it actually allows us to grow relationally and spiritually.

Mark: Selflessness is a form of serving, in fact, it is the outgrowth of a servant heart. We lay down our lives just like Jesus laid down His life for us.

Jill: Selflessness is a beautiful gift we can give our spouse. Go ahead and give it a try…and accept the call to be wildly selfless!