Today is our Third Thursday Blog Hop where you get to interact with other mom bloggers who are discussing the topic of the day: No More Perfect Days.
As a mom, I like to have my ducks in a row. However, it seems that my ducks more often like to waddle in a different direction than I have planned for them!
What’s a mom to do when her plans fall through?
After 28 years of mothering, I am finally learning how to better handle those moments. I’ve also come to understand that those “imperfect” moments in my day happen far more often than I realize.
I used to react. Now I’m learning to respond.
Reacting usually results in me being angry or yelling. I try to control the circumstances so they better match my expectations. The Mommy Monster almost always appears. Often an apology needs to be made in the end.
Responding usually results in me smiling, laughing, or just saying something like, “Of course…” “Of course, she filled her diaper within minutes of putting a fresh diaper on her,” “Of course, my son forgot his medicine and I need to run it to school,” “Of course, my husband forgot to stop by the store on the way home to pick up the gallon of milk I needed for dinner.” When I respond, conflict is reduced, grace prevails, and an apology is simply not needed.
When I am able to respond, I realize that the moment I’m in is just as important as the moment I planned on that didn’t happen the way I thought it would! I’m making memories either way…it will be a good memory, or one I wish I and my kids could forget.
When I’m able to respond, I can embrace “what is” instead of “what could have been.” I am also able to maximize an unexpected opportunity given to me.
What about you? How do you handle “imperfect” days? If you’ve learned to respond rather than react, can you share a practical way you’ve been able to make that transition?
Take some time to hop around to other Hearts at Home bloggers and see how they handle their imperfect days!
I have found that if I can pause long enough to take a breath, I can remind myself that God is watching and He knows the details and for some reason known to Himself He has allowed what is happening to happen. God is in control. Then I can respond in grace and truth. What a blessing.
I love your distinction between reacting and responding. For me, I am learning to recognize that much of my frustration comes in thinking my kids should know something that I haven’t actually taught them yet and in recognizing that I lose things too!
Good insight, Laura. You are right…it’s easy to get frustrated at how our kids do something but often we really haven’t taught them yet!
Ah. This is a struggle for me right now. I am the pregnant mother of a three-year-old and I seem to be very short on patience these days. I’ve taught my son to take deep breaths when frustrated, and he’s been coaching me in the same activity. “Take a breath, Mama! Are you so frustrated?” They really do help. Mommy time-outs (a moment to yourself to calm down) make a huge difference too. Thanks for this encouragement, Jill!
Great idea, Sarah!