A week ago last Friday I had knee surgery for a torn meniscus. The first few days I was pretty much attached to my recliner and Mark served as a wonderful nurse.
Just a few days ago, Mark injured his back at work. He’s been down for the entire weekend alternating between ice and heat. Now we’ve flip flopped our roles.
Within the span of one week we’re once again reminded of our differences. When I’m sick or injured, I want to be left alone. When Jill is sick, she wants to be tended to.
We are SO DIFFERENT!
The worst thing a married couple can do is assume the other person wants what you would want in a certain situation. Instead of imposing our likes and dislikes on our spouse, we have to seek to understand their likes and dislikes when they are feeling under the weather.
A great time to talk about this is when you’re both healthy. There’s nothing worse than having unmet expectations when you’re already not feeling your best!
If you don’t already know the answers to these questions, take some time to get to know each another’s preferences:
- When you are sick, do you want me to anticipate your needs like getting medication, making meals, etc?
- When you don’t feel well, do you want to be left alone and trust that if you need something, you’ll let me know?
- Do you want me to rub your feet, rub your back, or comfort you in any way, when you’re not feeling well?
- Do you want me to just take care of myself and let you take care of yourself, when you’re under the weather?
- When you’re not your best, what household responsibilities would you like me to pick up so you don’t have to worry about them?
What about you? What do you prefer when you’re sick or injured? What about your spouse?
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