Mark: Well it was bound to happen at some time. We’ve both been different people since putting back the pieces of our broken relationship six years ago. We interact differently, we respond differently, we work to think differently. But Friday night we went back...
Mark: Words matter. But even more than the choice of our words, it’s the way we deliver our words that can make the biggest difference in relationships. Jill: In marriage, the way we deliver our words can add more meaning to them than we often intend. Or in some...
Mark: One of the things Jill and I try to do every January is to talk about what we will do in the coming year to prioritize our marriage. What will we do on a daily basis to stay connected? What will we do for a date night on a regular basis–that we can put on...
Mark: Last Fall, Jill and I were challenged by our friends Greg and Julie Gorman to begin thinking about the core values of our marriage. These are shared values that help us to clarify our shared purpose. As individuals we may have personal core values that our...
Jill: December is a full month for most of us. Shopping. Christmas entertainment and school programs. Holiday parties. Church Programs. Baking. Decorating the tree. Holiday gatherings with extended family. Travel. New Years. Mark: We’re adding a wedding in...
Hello Jill and Mark: I need advice on how to learn to “let it go” when it comes to marriage. This is in relation to things like broken promises about household projects and such. I realized this morning that I need to figure out how to let it go. Signed,...
Jill: It all started with a conversation I had with a friend. We were talking about marriage and the topic turned to sex. In their marriage she has a higher sex drive than her husband. Their physical intimacy happens only 6-8 times a year. This is something that...
Jill: Years ago, Mark and I made a decision to not exchange physical gifts at Christmas. Instead we try to give our marriage time, energy, and focus in some way. Mark: So what are you getting your marriage for Christmas? Seems like a silly question, doesn’t it?...
Mark: Jill and I are in Orlando, Florida today because I had the privilege of officiating the wedding of some dear friends of ours last night. While we were there we had a little bit of fun in the photo booth at the reception! Jill: As Mark was doing the ceremony he...
Mark: “I’m just tired and I want to be done.” I’ve heard that from two long-married, currently separated couples in the last month. I understand those feelings. I was there seven years ago, too. Jill: That’s really how the slow fades...
Mark: One of the ways Jill and I are different has to do with surprises. I love surprises. Jill….not so much. Jill: If you’ve taken our free No More Perfect Marriages E-Challenge, you’ll take a quiz that helps you determine if you’re...
Mark: Jill had a unique opportunity for a girlfriend trip to Florida this past week so we spent the week apart. When one of us travels, we’ve found it very important to have a plan for staying connected. Jill: As a recovering avoider, I have to work to think...
Mark: It happens every time we travel. I throw clothes in a suitcase and walk out the door. For Jill it’s not that easy. She has a list she wants to do before we leave: water the flowers, run the vacuum, fold the laundry, and sometimes pay a few bills. That difference...
Mark: I remember when I first became a Christian, I heard about the concept of “dying to self.” It was often used to describe those times when we wrestle with God between doing things our way versus doing things His way. It was “dying to self” that motivated me to...
Mark: When Jill and I wrote No More Perfect Marriages we identified what we call the Seven Slow Fades where our hearts slowly and unknowingly pull away from each other. We also identified the Eight God-Tools that stop the fades in their tracks. Jill: The past two...
